One Chinese gymnast = India's Gold Medal tally since 1896
Sushmita Sen - 1.2 feet = Salman Khan
Special Effects in Shampoo ads = Special effects in Jurassic park
4 weeks in Switzerland + London + New Zealand = 4 minute song in
10 Midday mates < 5 minutes of FTV
One engagement + Two weddings + Three wedding songs + Four hundred
Relatives + A house bigger than Buckingham Palace = One Sooraj Barjataya Film
Ajay Devgan + cosmetic surgery + acting ability + personality +
own production company = Kajol
Rona dhona x Bewafai x Badle ki aag = Your mum's favourite serials
Star Movies - Rerun + Good Movies = HBO
Amitabh Bachchan - Mrityudaata + Kaun Banega Crorepati = A SUPERSTAR
Amitabh Bachchan + Jaya Bachchan - Talent = Abhishek Bachchan
Atal Bihari - Bad knee = Still our LAST HOPE
In the middle of the beautiful deserted island.
There is a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere
where the following group of people is stranded:
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 Bulgarian men and 1 Bulgarian woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Indian men and 1 Indian woman
One month later on this absolutely stunning deserted island
in the middle of nowhere, the following has occurred:
One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman.
The two French men and the French woman are living happily
together in a "menage a trois".
The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they
alternate with the German woman.
The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek
woman is cleaning and cooking for them.
The Bulgarian men took a long look at the endless ocean
and one look at the Bulgarian woman and they started swimming.
The Irish began by dividing up their island, Northside and
Southside, and by setting up a distillery. They do not
remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of
foggy after the first few liters of coconut whiskey, but at
least the English are not getting any.
The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide
while the American woman keeps on talking about her body
being her own, the true nature of feminism, how she can do
everything that they can do, about the necessity of fulfillment,
the equal division of household chores, how her last boyfriend
respected her opinion and treated her much nicer and how her
relationship with her mother is improving. But at least the
taxes are low and it is not raining.....AND...
The 2 Indian men are still waiting for someone to introduce
them to the Indian woman!!
Because, You were just homesick!!
So a Pakistani US citizen goes to the doctor because he just
simply doesn't feel good. He's tired, his stomach is upset, he has a
headache. Just feels terrible.
The doctor checks him over and can't find any medical reason for
him to feel the way he does. He offers a Naturotherepy approach that
he has seen work before. The Pakistani man is stunned, though, that the
treatment means he has to go home, shit and piss into a plastic
bag and leave it in his basement for a week.
"Trust me," the doctor says, "I have seen this work."
The man goes home and follows through on the instructions. Within
a day, though his house smells terrible and by the end of the week,
it is an overwhelming stench. His eyes water every time he walks in
the door, but he feels no better.
He calls to yell at the doctor who calmly says, "Go down and take
three big deep breaths directly from the bag and you will be
"You're crazy!" comes the reply.
"Trust me." says the doctor.
Down he goes into the basement and he takes the first breath.
Gagging and choking, he does it again. Then, on the third breath,
he feels the headache leave. His stomach settles and he feels
amazingly well. The stench is even tolerable. He calls the doctor to
tell him the good news.
"I told you I've seen this work with people from Pakistan
before," says the doctor. "You were just homesick!"
Magic of a life
The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends.
I mean, life is tough. It takes a lot of your time.
What do you get at the end of it? A death. What's that, a bonus?
I think the cycle is all backwards. You should die first.
Get it out of the way. Then live in an old age home.
You get kicked out when you're too young. You get a gold
watch. You go to work.
You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your
You sleep around, drink alcohol. You party. You get ready for high school.
You go to grade school. You become a kid. You play. You have no
You become a little baby. You go back into the womb.
You spend your last nine months floating . . . . you finish off as an
I forgot her name about 10 years ago...
Santa was invited to Banta's home for dinner, where he noticed that his buddy preceded every
request to his wife with endearing terms, calling her Jalebi, Honey, Pyaari, Darling, Sweetheart
etc. He was impressed, since the couple had been married almost 40 years.
While the wife was in the kitchen, Santa said, "I think it's wonderful that after all these years, you
still call bhabhiji those pet names."
Banta hung his head. "To tell you the truth, I forgot her name about 10 years ago."
I'm Bond, I'm Subramaniam.
James Bond comes out of British Airways at Chennai, goes to his waiting driver and says "I'm Bond, James Bond. James to
For which the driver replies "I'm Subramaniam, Bala Subramaniam. Balls to you..."