Dealing with postnatal depressionPost-childbirth there will be changes in a woman's sexuality. There will be physical as well as emotional changes in her. She will be extremely exhausted and sleep-deprived. Her pelvic nerves and muscles may also have been damaged during delivery, lowering genital sensitivity. Breastfeeding lowers levels of estradial (the hormone responsible for keeping the urogenital tract lubricated and supple) thereby decreasing her urge for sexual pleasure. And it also raises the prolactin hormone, which suppresses sexual desire and lowers testosterone. Thus post childbirth sex maybe not be the first thing on her mind, nor is it going to be for the immediate ensuing hours and days ahead but at some point it will come definitely come back in. We have tried to explain by way of this article all the possible problems faced by couples in their sex life after pregnancy and tried to find solutions for those problems in order to make your sex life pleasurable and fulfilling.

Problems faced by couples in their sex-life after childbirth

  • It is normally seen that mothers are too tired nursing, feeding and looking after the baby that they totally neglect their partners who in turn feel undesired and as a result of that he may withdraw, causing the woman to shut down further.
  • Due to the physical changes in the mother caused due to pregnancy, mothers start feeling undesired themselves and they shun away from their partner. Men also are less aroused as a result of which sex becomes an absolute negative factor in their life.
  • There will be changes in a woman's sexuality after the birth of the baby. There will be some temporary changes in the shape and sensitivity of your vagina (these can be helped by having your gynaecologist teach you how to do "Kegel" exercises); and sometimes permanent changes in the shape and "look" of the external genitals. This also causes problems in sexual pleasure.

Tips to bring back sexual pleasure in your life after childbirth.

Be Patient

Childbirth brings in lots of responsibility. It also has quite an impact on your body and thus you need some time to bring back your organs to normalcy. Guys you have to help out your wife and be very supportive, loyal and co-operative. After childbirth, there is going to be a lot of tenderness so the first time you make love, take it slow and steady. The episiotomy site might not have had the chance to heal over completely and even if your stitches have long since healed, it can take literally months for the soreness in the area to clear up. Therefore go-slow and the slower you take it the better.

Lubrication is essential
Normally lubrication might not be a problem but after childbirth poses as a big problem because the female body is producing different hormones and can dry up the 'vaginal secretions' which in turn makes things quite dry and uncomfortable because of the friction while making love. If this does happen to you, you can get water-soluble lubricants at the Chemist. In severe cases of dryness please consult your doctor.

Experimenting is quite fun

Even if you are a strict missionary person, you must experiment because that position is the worst for creating pressure on the tender area. Try experimenting in a variety of positions which make intercourse as comfortable as possible, you never know you might find some positions that you like and carry on doing it. After all experimenting is always fun and causes lots of excitement in your sex life. Tried and trusted post-baby positions are the woman on top, sitting, on the table and side-lying positions.

Accept the physical changes

There will be physical changes that both the partners will have to accept and get used to. For example if it has been a vaginal birth then sex will be a little different coz the vagina will be a little loose. Over time the vaginal muscles will tone it down a bit but it will never be 'as it was' before. It's not uncommon at all for breasts to start leaking during intercourse even if you have just fed the little one just before you started so don't be alarmed. Avoid missionary position because weight on top of the breasts can very easily start the breasts 'leaking'.

Take advice of your doctor

It is recommended that you talk warmly and openly about your sexual needs with your doctor and take their advice. Be sure to tell your doctor that you intend to continue and improve your sexual relationship after childbirth. If he advises you against sexual intercourse, always ask "Why?" and "For how long?"

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