Pregnency & parenting
Subject : Pregnancy delimma!
Question : I am 26 and am 9 weeks pregnant. The problem actually is that i am just engaged and am getting married only in December. My fiance has asked me to go for an abortion. I am totally confused. What can I do? I dont want to abort but he has refused to go ahead with the child. Any suggestions!
Posted by : Anoushka_S
Posted on : 2004-07-24
Reply : WOW!! You guys are harsh. Based on the date you've probably already done something by now or already had the baby. I wish you luck in whatever "you" have decided to do. the key word is "you" of course it takes two to have a baby. But it's "your" choice just as much as his. He doesn't have to take role in this. What anyone else's beliefs are in this does not matter. It's a WOMAN's right to choose, This is coming from a MAN. The most important thing to do is talk to your family. No this is not bad advice you might have to hear about it at first. Atleast you will be able to live with yourself, if it is that you made the choice you wanted to make. Think about this dear girl, weigh out the pros and cons. Weigh out your relationship with this man, how supportive is he of you? Will he be supportive in the decisions you make for the rest of your life. I hope you made the choice you wanted to make, because it is your right to choose.
From : Montu Shah
On : 2005-06-14
Reply : hello Anoushka, I have a different view point than the others. If you are ready for the baby, have it BUT if you are not ready at the moment and you also love your man and do feel that it makes a sense aborting, then go for it. There is no point bringing a baby in this world when you are unhappy and cannot enjoy the motherhood by loosing your partner and getting disgraced. I believe in god and I do feel that Mistakes can happen but it never means that you have to live with them. If you feel that you will be more happy having this baby and that you will be able to provide him/her all you wish to, then go for it. And if you feel you can trust your partner and family, then listen to them. Its not true that you cannot be pregnant again. A woman is fertile till age 30. I'm married for two yrs, I was pregnant last yr and had to abort my baby because of certain reasons which I feel were valid and I do not regret at all. Luckly I never had to go through the pain I, my hubby or my baby wud have had to suffer if it was in my womb in its 7th-8th moth, when suddenly I realised i had cancer (which I did not know earlier, I have no history of cancer in my generations and I'm only 26 yrs old). I wud have been left with no option but to abort when the baby wud have been 8 months!! That would have been harder. And the best part is that I've recovered from the cancer and am also pregnant... So, think rationally what is good for you and your family. You need to know your priorities. I apologise if I said anything wrong and have hurt anybody's feelings, but that's my story and that's how I feel Take Care
From : XYZ
On : 2005-06-09
Reply : I am 26 and just got married last December! I want to be pregnant soon. But my frind is 5 months pregnant and she was just married in April and she looked beautiful. She wasn't sure of what she was going to do either. And now she is married and her baby will be here in September. A baby is a blessing but if your not ready then its okay to make that decison. You will not be a bad person for it. Just make sure its what you really want and not because you may look fat in a wedding dress. Good luck
From : Maria
On : 2005-05-31
Reply : Hi! It is actually ridiculous to get pregnant before marriage. What a female you are. Is your fiance really a human being to ask you to remove your pregnancy? Where did his mind go before making you pregnant. And it is always said that the first pregnancy should not be aborted. It will be difficult when you really want to have a baby. B'cos the first time women is very fertile compared to the second and third times. You and your finace are considered as murderers if you go for an abortion. It is a god's gift to have a child. Either of you have any right to remove it. Don't be a BITCH. Try to be a good mother for once. Take care.
From : Radhika
On : 2005-03-25
Reply : hi Never in life ever think of abortion unless when you dont know how precious a child is.Remember a baby is a blessing to any woman.If u arbort it will continue haunting you for the rest of your life.and you will always think that you are a murderer.life is full of difficulties and complications.Dont run away from them just learn to have solutions for them otherwise u will end up killing your self too.Tell your fiance how much you want that pregnancy and if he really cares he will respond positively.
From : Hellen
On : 2005-02-17
Reply : hi, i am 30 yo and have just had my 1st child--he is now 2 months old. I was told that I would not be able to ever conceive a healthy child due to the fact that I had cancer in my teens that has currently affected my health in other ways. My husband and I consider this child to be a miracle and would never even consider life without him. This pregnancy of yours should not be looked at as a problem (perhaps a difficult situation--but, not entirely impossible). The joy this child will bring you will be immeasureable--the feelings you will feel can not be duplicated with any other situation you will ever experience. I would give my life for my child and I can guarantee you that once you and your fiance set eyes on your baby, you will feel the same way.
From : concerned
On : 2004-10-22
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