|Marriage & Beyond|
|Subject : ||should i get married?|
|Question : ||hey guys.. my name is sonia i m from new york city i m 19 graduating this yr.. i wanted to ask someone this question for long time cuz i really duno wt's the answer to this question. i been dating my b/f for 1 and half yr we came so..close but in the middle we did kind of messed up we started to have lot of arguments and it ws very scary cuz.. we got to that point where we started to hit eachother. but after that fight we promised eachother never to do anything like that again. he asked me to marry.. and i said yes but not too sure should i marry him or no cuz of wat happend in the past between us. |
|Posted by : ||sonia|
|Posted on : ||2003-05-15|
|Reply : ||Hey Sonia, this dont seem like a good relationship. This the sign that its gonna end up bad, you still have time to get out of this relationship, if you havent done so. I work with Domestic Violence victims and as far as i have seen most of them were also given signs of potential domestic violence. its not only youself you have to think about. If you have kids w/ this guy, I can bet you million dollar that your kids will be treated in same way, which probably dont want, would you?? just that you know very few domestic violence victims survive and its very hard to get out of relationship, but you wil either end up dead or you will kill him to save your life when you feel tht he is danger to you and your kids. You might wana seek some professional counseling to to deal with it, i know its very difficult. |
|From : ||Preet|
|On : ||2005-12-27|
|Reply : ||hey sonia da best thing 2 do iz 2 put everythin bhind u both-if u both love eaxhother that much u will b able 2 do dat without hesitating. love is written in eneryonez fate but it's up 2 uz to watch out 4 it n when we find it, then we shud never let go...|
|From : ||nahima begum|
|On : ||2003-10-22|
|Reply : ||Sonia,
This appears to be a very difficult situation for you. I can understand that you may be having many contradicting feelings.
Violence in a relationship is many times indicative of both learned past behaviour and is a very good predictor of future behaviour. There are many studies that show this could be an issue later for both of you.
It is also shown that people move forward into this type of relationship in spite of gut feeling not to. It often results in issues later that result in divorce and/or health issues (due to domestic violence).
Since you have been going out for some time that are strong bonds and many levels between the two of you, this makes it even more difficult to think of breaking up. Just the thought likely raises a high level of anxiety.
It is usually better to follow your gut. If you are thinking about it, your subconscious is sending you a warning signal.
Likely, this is not something you or he want to hear.
All the best.|
|From : ||Sanjeev|
|On : ||2003-05-28|
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